Fancy Face Cosmetics

In my profession I have the good fortune of meeting new people every single day. I see people laugh, people cry, people excited, people sad. I also, see how their lives get hijacked, how their opinions and desires get denied and undone. I recognize this when it happens because it has happened to me too…it’s happened to all of us, it’s just usually to late by the time we realize it. I got so sick and tired of negative comments, and nobody believing in me, with a few exceptions(I can actually hear my mom say “honey, I believed in you” and then crying…). So what I did was make a list. I made a list every single time someone has something negative to say, whether it’s to me or someone else, and I worked down that list to prove everybody wrong. And then I realized, I was spending so much time trying to please everyone else, that I forgot what was important; me!  Sound selfish? It’s quite the contrary actually.I have done a lot of thinking about what it means to please. To please the fashion setters, we starve ourselves. To please men, we act according to how we THINK they want us to. Take the advice of someone who had to kiss a lot of frogs before she found her prince. If you have to alter yourself in any way to please him, HE IS NOT WORTH IT.

The act of pleasing makes everything murky. We lose track of ourselves. We stop uttering declaratory sentences. We stop directing our lives. We forget what we know. We start making everything OK, rather than real. Instead of trying to please, this is a challenge to provoke, to dare, to satisfy your own imagination and appetite. To take responsibility for who you are. So throw out your “list”, look yourself in the mirror every day, and say “I believe in you. I believe in your authenticity, your uniqueness, your intensity, and your passion. I believe you when you say you will change the world.” It may sound corny, but the day I threw out my list, and started “believing myself”, was the day my life changed.

xoxo,
Nikki